War, Heat, and the Boston Redux.

I heard a song on the radio today that I had heard before and have never found out who sings it. At the end of it I waited for the DJ to announce who it was (incidentally, he didn’t say who it was on intro) but instead he kept rambling on about dogs and cats.  

This REALLY pissed me off as I REALLY wanted to quote a line from the song and give proper attribution. 

Anyway, here we are in yet another crisis involving scum sucking, booger eating Islamic terrorists on one side and civilization on the other side. Now, on the near horizon, yet another is raising its ugly head as Somali militants are declaring holy war against Ethiopia. What the F*&K is holy about ANY war? 

Not that I give two shits about either one of those two piss ant countries. But where all the pundits and spin doctors and talking heads are declaring that we are at the start of World War III, I have to disagree. 

This has been going on for quite some time and is finally shaping up to be two distinct sides in what appears to be the much anticipated climactic battle of good versus evil. 

Who is good and who is evil depends on your point of view, I suppose. But, I’m inclined to believe that we (the non-terrorist, civilized bunch with bigger guns (oxymoron?)) are the good guys here. 

I liken the present Israeli – Hezbollah conflict to an incident that happened to me when I was in 5th or 6th grade. There was a kid on my bus who picked on me and bullied me unmercifully every day. I would just suck it up and get off at my stop (one of the first stops) and forget about it until the next day. 

Then, one day, this kid decided to get off at my stop so he could continue his assault. Well, I had to draw the line there and decided to make a stand. Months of rage and frustration that had been building every day that he picked on me finally came pouring out in the form of an ass-kicking the likes of which this kid had never experienced. It is now my sincere hope that Hezbollah is in the same receive mode. 

Although nobody ever really wants war, I really believe that Israel has had enough and is quite justified in their present action. And good ol’ Major Bob (Bevelacqua) on Fox News is a twit. For someone who supposedly served in Special Forces and should be acutely aware of the cultural, religious and political as well as military necessity of Israel’s actions, he instead states that the Israelis should show restraint and tone down their actions and stay out of Lebanon.  

Bullshit, Bob. 

You complain about Israel’s apparent use of disproportionate force and that they should be stopped so that people and businesses can get back to their daily lives. All the while getting your face resurrected as the TV counter-terrorism expert while, I’m sure, hoping to generate more business for your company in the region. Ooooh, wait a minute, you already HAVE a company doing business in… let’s see, where was it again? Oh, yeah… Lebanon! 

Face it, Bob. Hezbollah, Hamas, UBL, GSPC, and the rest of those barbarians deserve whatever amount of force necessary to eliminate them from the face of the planet.  

They’re TERRORISTS, Bob! They don’t give a rat’s ass for ANYONE! Be they Christian, Jew, Muslim or anything else, military or civilian (how many Hezbollah targets are actually military targets?), THEY DON’T CARE! As long as they get to kill in the name of their “God.” 

And if some countries have to bear some of the pain, so be it. Especially if the REAL government of that particular country is the one operating in the shadows or if the government is actually backing the actions of these groups. And if the rest of the “civilized” world would realize that and join in the “Global” War On Terror with more than rhetoric and hollow promises, and weak pansy-assed pleas for a “diplomatic solution,” the sooner the world would be rid of these savages.  

Just exactly where did you serve in Special Forces, Bob? I don’t see it in your bio. (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,37303,00.html)  

OK. I guess I can probably cross you off my list of potential employers should I decide to leave my present position, eh? 

Meanwhile… 

It’s HOT here. Damn HOT! We are actually experiencing summer weather here in the UK.  Today was not quite as hot as it has been for the past week or so. It would equate to a nice comfortable autumn day…in Abu Dhabi. 

My family and I just got back from Boston. My daughter, Ronnie, is now 11 years old and has a bit better appreciation for a lot of things than she did the last time we were here. For instance, she now appreciates the difference between a delivery chain pizza and a freshly made one from a real “Mom and Pop” pizzeria (like Pizza Joe's on Elm Street in Everett, MA). She has fully experienced fried clams WITH BELLIES from Kelly’s in Revere Beach.

On the downside, she also got to experience shopping in stores like Old Navy, T.J. Max, The Christmas Tree Shoppe, and Macy’s (the store in Saugus that was formerly Filene’s). 

She also got to see my grandmother. My Nana, who is 97 years young was still razor sharp in mind if not in body, really enjoyed the visit as well. Of course, I’m hoping that Ronnie will forget the tales of my youth that my Aunt Marie and Uncle Art regaled her with. And, although Ronnie did get to meet my cousin, Bobby, I regret that she didn’t get to meet my cousin, Todd. Of course, putting me together with Todd should never be done without adequate bail money on hand.  I also wish that I would have known about the great annual family gathering that happened two days before I visited my Nana. There I would have gotten to see the entire clan, including Todd and my Uncle Andy and my other aunts, uncles and cousins. I will make a point of getting there for the next one.

I also owe my sister, June, a great debt of gratitude. She loaned me a car for almost my entire time there. Actually, the car she loaned me was the car I sold her 7 ½ years ago. Anyway, it was a Godsend. She also turned me on to my two new favorite summer drinks, the Mojito and the Key Lime Martini. Thanks also to her husband, Rich, who provided much needed testosterone with manly activities like barbecuing and baseball to counteract the high levels of estrogen that surrounded me on this trip. I did say thanks by taking her and Rich out to dinner at a really nice little Italian restaurant in Winthrop, MA. Can’t for the life of me remember the name, though. Anyway, it ended up being 8 people including a couple I had not seen in many years. I’ve gotta say, too, that the food I ordered, the Risotto Della Casa, was exquisite. When the bill came, I grabbed it and looked at it and proudly announced to the group, “I’ve got it.” 

Yeah, that’s me, the big shot. 

As the group started to object and say things like, “Are you sure?” I just looked at the bill again, choked back laughter, and repeated, “I’ve got it.”

As it turns out, the cost of the meal for 8 people was approximately the cost for one person anywhere around here where I live. Hell, I’ve left bigger tips in some of the finer pubs around here and the food is nowhere near as good as it was in that little restaurant. I did, however, appease the group by allowing our friend, Ralph, to leave the tip. 

Oh, and for my shopping? I got to spend some time in Home Depot (dragging Ronnie by the hand, “SNIFFFF! You smell that? It’s WOOD! Real WOOD! SNIFFFFF!”) I also brought back 9 lbs of hot dogs. REAL hot dogs. Kayem “Old Tyme” natural casing hot dogs. And Hebrew National ¼ pound Jumbo Hot Dogs. All purchased at my new favorite store, Costco.

Anyhoo… it’s Friday, it’s still hot, it just rained, I’ve got Gary Hoey’s “Monster Surf” album cranked up while drinking freshly made key lime martinis and life is good! 

Oh, yeah. The song quote: 

“God damn right, it’s a beautiful day.” 

I would appreciate attribution if anyone knows it. Email me at: mike at thesandwich dot com. 

            - Thanks to my old bud, Hans Von Milla, for the attribution update. The song is called, "Mr. E's Beautiful Blues," and is by the group, "Eels."

And remember, 

Life is a sandwich. Eat it up!